Allen Ludden did not light up on TV...Lets kick off Monday on the show...It's Opening Audio time...Do you trust a man who likes to jump rope? Especially who likes double dutch? A man who enjoys doing that, saved a boy with his rope...We conclude he took the boy to Subway afterwards for a sandwich...Know what a keester watcher is? An elderly woman was stopped at customs for having cocaine in her wheelchair as well as in her keester...We concluded yet again that there is a chunky customs agent that is strictly on keester duty...Someone fire up the lunk alarm...A man was being judged for grunting in yoga class...That is why men don't workout...Thanks Marsha for the workout harping...Jelly Roll is misleading folks...He lost 120lbs, but he needs to admit he's a Semaglutide Sammy...Johnny called and thinks its banana hammock time with the weather getting nice...Diddy was transported to the hospital in the middle of the night for an issue with his knee...Justin Tucker of the Baltimore Ravens loves the brush against...10 massage therapist are accusing him of taking IT out...Google has a new AI feature to where they will call businesses for you, i.e. setting up an oil change...A priest used a girl's hair to floss his teeth, and then he growled at her...If the altar boy didn't make him burnt meatloaf, he wouldn't have had anything stuck in his teeth...Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow which means 6 more weeks of winter...We are worried what he's going through at Gobbler's Knob...The real groundhog Staten Island Chuck who is 85% right says spring is coming sooner...Rizzo wants to own a finger puppet theater...That is on his bucket list...That is nothing compared to this 13-year-old kids list that went viral...The Buroughs is a new senior citizen version of the show Stranger Things...Let's lay down on those tumbleweeds...NFL players will make some nice bonuses this weekend...A man broke into a mall just for Cinnabon...Let's enjoy some gooey together, as we listen to this Monday edition of The Rizzo & Jeff Show!!