Me, mySELF, & EI Part 3 - Understanding 'The Self' with Dr. Zelda Di Blasi - EP162
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Description
Hi again & welcome to the series on Emotional Intelligence. As I was putting together the outline of all the areas of focus for this series, it became obvious that...
show moreAs I was putting together the outline of all the areas of focus for this series, it became obvious that before going into self-awareness, self-confidence and all other aspects of ‘self’, it would be valuable to dive into what is ‘self’ in it’s own right. To have self understood first before going further was my goal with this episode.
Thanks for John McCarthy, head of Applied Psychology at UCC, I was connected with Dr. Zelda Di Blasi, and we recently recorded this one over zoom, all about ‘Self’.
About Dr. Di Blasi
Dr Zelda Di Blasi, MPsychSc, PhD, CPsychol (BPS) is co-director of the MA in Positive & Coaching Psychology. After completing her Masters in Health Psychology at University College Galway, founded by the Medical Research Council, Zelda completed her PhD/DPhil in Health Sciences at the University of York on the placebo effect and health care interactions.
Her interest in Positive Psychology evolved during her Post-Doctorate in Integrative Medicine and Health Psychology, when Zelda worked with Professor Susan Folkman at the University of California San Francisco (UCSF). A that time, she received a Teaching Fellowship from UCSF and San Francisco State University.
In 2006 Zelda took up her appointment as lecturer in the School of Applied Psychology in UCC, and later set up a Masters programme in Positive & Coaching Psychology, which she currently co-directs.
Zelda has diplomas in Contemporary Yoga and Modern Dance, and an Advanced Diploma in Personal, Leadership and Executive Coaching accredited by the ICF and the EMCC. She is a certified Health & Wellness Coach with the Institute of Health Sciences, a HeartMath Coach/Mentor, and a Strengths Provider with CAPP (Centre of Applied Positive Psychology).
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During this interview we discussed:
Zelda’s background in Psychology and teaching
Doing her PhD on the placebo effect
How she discovered her interest for Psychology at the age of 18 and falling in love with the area
Zelda’s interest and passion for learning including Yoga, Mindfulness and Modern Dance and how this all connects in with the Mind, Body and Spirit
What is ‘the self’ and how does it develop?
Finding the answer to the question ‘who am I?’
How does ‘the self’ influence how we think
When is it formed?
Breaking down the self – what is it made up of?
The mirror test with a baby to show a sense of self has developed
Why we use it so naturally without thought?
Identity v Self – crossovers and comparisons
Self is more at the marco level
History of the self?
William James the first professor of psychology
Schools of Thought on it?
The role of Ego and how it compares to Self?
Value of Self-esteem, compassion and empathy
Emphasis on self-compassion more than self-esteem
The Self and spirituality
Is Self an Illusion? Or is it real?
Ted Talks worth checking out on Self
Christine Neff - The space between self-compassion and self-esteem
Daniel Gilbert – Talk on Happiness – affective forecasting
Biases that exist on self
the illusion of transparency – eg presenting and anxious about this – we are over estimating what others see in us
the spotlight effect – eg you feel like you’re on stage and with a spotlight on you – but the fact is people aren’t looking at you in that way – the cool v nerdy t-shirt example
Affective forecasting – what you think will make you happy or unhappy – turns out we are not very good
Durability bias – how will you feel if you get a promotion at work? How long will this feeling last? Not that long….for some more than others
Just being aware of these biases helps and focusing on the present!
How to get a better sense of self in the world we live in now?
Tools that you can use to better understand Self
The Best Possible Self?
4 days visualizing what this looks like for you
10 mins a day
Do it in a real relaxed space
Connect with the feeling
What comes up and what the image is?
What your dream or ideal self looks like?
Then devise the steps to take to get there!
Visualization tools & Vision boards
Taking one small step at a time
The value of journaling each day helps to learn more about self
6 minute journal
Morning pages (30mins)
The home retreat you have now!
Random acts of kindness
What Zelda is working on now – the Book on Pleasure!
How to Connect in with Zelda – email: diblasi@ucc.ie
If you’re interested in more details on what was covered in this episode, would like to explore your own Emotional Intelligence deeper, I’d be happy to discuss this further and look at coaching opportunities.
Please do get in touch via email at Rob@robofthegreen.ie or connect in over any of the social channels - @robofthegreen
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