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Life has a weird way of making the most amazing people feel like they’re not good enough. You know, not smart enough, pretty enough, or skinny enough. The Drop the...
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Life has a weird way of making the most amazing people feel like they’re not good enough. You know, not smart enough, pretty enough, or skinny enough. The Drop the BS podcast is dedicated to inspiring you through those moments. In each episode, seasoned therapist Dr. Kirleen Neely will take you in session to learn the tools you need to drop your backstory and live your best today story.306221
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Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen
108: Six Parenting Mistakes to Avoid
2 JUL 2024 · Parenting can often feel overwhelming, with many parents questioning their judgment and wondering if they're getting it right. A study by Psychology Today found that nearly 70% of parents frequently worry about whether they're making the right decisions. While there is no definitive parenting handbook, there are best practices that can help navigate the journey of raising children.
In this episode of the podcast, drawing from my 25 years of experience working with thousands of couples, we dive into six common parenting mistakes that you should avoid. This isn't an exhaustive list but rather a guide to help you avoid some of the pitfalls that can complicate your relationship with your children.Whether you're a parent, an aunt, a grandparent, or someone who supports parents, these insights are designed to be practical and impactful.
Key Takeaways:
- Building Trust Over Authority: Avoid using power over your children. Build trust so they confide in you, giving you the chance to guide them effectively.
- Avoiding Comparisons: Stop comparing your kids to their siblings or cousins. It breeds unhealthy competition and resentment.
- Preparing for Reality: Shielding children from life's hardships doesn't prepare them for the real world. Show them how to navigate challenges without burdening them.
- Balanced Parenting: Swinging to the opposite extreme of your own upbringing can create new issues. Aim for a balanced approach.
- Listening First: Children need to feel heard. Instead of jumping to solutions, listen and validate their feelings first.
- Supporting Growth: Avoid overreacting to current behaviors. Kids evolve and support their growth without fixating on the present.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Neely Counseling Center https://neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
107: Like Who Likes You - Stop Chasing Dead-End Relationships
4 JUN 2024 · In today's episode, we dive into the heart of building healthier relationships by exploring the concept of "like who likes you." Many of us find ourselves chasing after unreciprocated affection or approval, often investing time and energy in relationships that don't truly value us. It's time to shift our focus to those who genuinely appreciate us and bring positivity into our lives.
We'll break down the signs of a healthy relationship, such as mutual respect, shared decision-making, and the ability to be yourself without fear of judgment. Recognizing these signs can help you reassess your current connections and determine which ones are worth nurturing.We'll discuss practical strategies for letting go of relationships that don't uplift you and creating space for those that do.
If you're ready to stop chasing dead-end situations and start embracing connections that enhance your well-being, this episode offers the insights and steps you need. Learn how to transform your relationship dynamics and build a support network that truly values you.
Key Takeaways
- In a healthy relationship, you are accepted for who they are, fostering greater satisfaction and stability.
- A supportive relationship helps you grow and improve, encouraging self-development and new experiences.
- Healthy relationships involve shared decision-making and influence, creating a balanced and fair dynamic.
- Fundamental traits like reliability, kindness, and trustworthiness are essential for good relationships.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Master Class Sign Uphttps://neelycounseling.com/bsb-masterclass/
Neely Counseling Center https://neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
106: Mindset Makeover: Take Control of Your Thoughts
7 MAY 2024 · In today's episode we are diving into the heart of mindset – a topic that touches every aspect of our lives. What exactly does mindset entail, and why does it matter so much for our mental well-being? Join us as we explore real-life stories and practical insights that shed light on the power of our thoughts and beliefs.Get ready to connect with the journey of a woman who experienced a profound shift in mindset.Through her story, we'll see firsthand how a negative mindset can hold us back and how a simple change in perspective can open doors to new possibilities.But this isn't just about theory – we're breaking down the science behind mindset in relatable terms. Discover how our brain chemistry influences our outlook on life, and learn practical strategies to rewire your thinking for the better. So, if you're feeling stuck or looking to improve your mental outlook, this episode is for you. Tune in for insights, inspiration, and actionable steps to take control of your thoughts and embrace a mindset that empowers you to thrive.
Key Takeaways:
- Thought Choice and Belief Alignment: Your thoughts are powerful creators of your reality. Rather than passively accepting whatever thoughts come to mind, actively choose beliefs that align with your aspirations and values. Remember, you don't always get what you want, but rather what you deeply believe. This emphasizes the importance of consciously shaping your beliefs to manifest your desired outcomes.
- The Power of Neutrality: While positivity is often celebrated, maintaining a neutral perspective can be equally impactful. Striking a balance between optimism and realism, neutrality allows for clear-headed assessment and effective decision-making. By avoiding the extremes of overly optimistic or pessimistic thinking, you cultivate resilience and adaptability in navigating life's challenges.
- Mindset's Deep Impact on Brain Chemistry: The connection between mindset and brain chemistry runs deep, influencing your mental and emotional well-being in profound ways. Shifting your mindset can lead to tangible changes in neurotransmitter activity, such as increased serotonin and dopamine levels associated with feelings of happiness and motivation. By understanding this link, you unlock the potential for a cascade of positive benefits, from improved mood to enhanced cognitive function and overall psychological resilience.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Master Class Sign Uphttps://neelycounseling.com/bsb-masterclass/
Neely Counseling Center https://neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
105: Fearless Living: Breaking Free from Fear and Phobias
2 APR 2024 · In this episode focused on Fearless Living, we dive deep into the world of fear and phobias, exploring how they can impact our lives and hinder us from living to our fullest potential. Join us as we unravel real-life stories and practical strategies to overcome these challenges and reclaim control of our lives. From understanding the difference between everyday fears and debilitating phobias to offering support to loved ones, we cover it all.
Key Takeaway's
Understanding Fear vs. Phobia:
Fear is a natural response to perceived threats, while phobias are intense and irrational fears of specific objects or situations. Phobias can significantly disrupt daily life and may require professional intervention.
Recognizing the Signs:
Physical symptoms, avoidance behavior, panic attacks, distress, and anticipatory anxiety are common indicators of phobias. Recognizing these signs is crucial in seeking appropriate help and support.
Strategies for Overcoming Fear:
Gradual exposure, mindfulness techniques, and positive self-talk can help individuals confront and manage their fears effectively. Seeking professional help, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and exposure therapy, can facilitate long-term recovery.
Supporting Loved Ones:
Educate yourself about your loved one's phobia and offer empathetic support without judgment. Encourage them to seek professional help and accompany them if needed.
On-the-Couch Takeaways:
If fear is impacting your life, don't ignore it or shame yourself. Seek help and support. Gradually facing your fears and practicing relaxation techniques can empower you to overcome them.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Master Class Sign Uphttps://neelycounseling.com/bsb-masterclass/
Neely Counseling Center https://neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
104: Backstory Triggers: How to Manage When Past Wounds Resurface
5 MAR 2024 · Ever found yourself suddenly overwhelmed by emotions from the past? It's like a tidal wave crashing into your present moment. In our latest episode, "Backstory Triggers," we dive deep into the powerful impact of unresolved experiences from the past resurfacing in your life. Learn why "If it's hysterical, it's probably historical." Understand the origins of exaggerated reactions and emotions by delving into unresolved experiences from the past. Explore how past traumas or unresolved issues influence present responses, shedding light on behavioral patterns and emotional triggers. Our guest expert licensed professional counselor, Roxanne Collins, drops so many nuggets of wisdom on this episode. Join us as we explore practical strategies to handle past wounds resurfacing in your life. Your backstory shapes your present, but it doesn't have to control your future.
Key Takeaways
- If it's hysterical, it's probably historical. Understand the origins of exaggerated reactions and emotions by delving into unresolved experiences from the past. Explore how past traumas or unresolved issues influence present responses, shedding light on behavioral patterns and emotional triggers.
- You have to ground yourself before you can elevate: Prioritize the psychological importance of grounding techniques in fostering self-awareness and emotional stability. Learn how techniques such as mindfulness and self-reflection can help slow down, center oneself, and process emotions effectively, laying the foundation for personal growth and resilience.
- You can show up for your old self as your new self: Navigate the journey of self-transformation by recognizing the tug-of-war between past habits and present aspirations. Explore strategies to confront and overcome old patterns of behavior, empowering your present self to make choices aligned with growth and authenticity.
Guest Bio
Roxanne Collins, is a dedicated Licensed Professional, is a beacon of support and transformation. With a Master's degree in School Counseling from The University of Texas at San Antonio, she has a deep understanding of the intricacies of human development, especially during the formative years of adolescence. Roxanne's journey began as an educator, where she witnessed firsthand that every student she encountered was crafting the early chapters of their life story, which would later shape their future. Her passion lies in assisting both adolescents and adults in rediscovering and rewriting the chapters of their life narratives, both past and present. Through a therapeutic lens, she helps individuals craft the chapters of their future, instilling hope and direction.Furthermore, Roxanne is committed to strengthening family bonds by empowering the unique identities of each family member. She firmly believes that each individual is the ultimate expert of their own life. To facilitate this process, Roxanne draws from a rich tapestry of therapeutic approaches, incorporating concepts from narrative therapy, person-centered theory, and cognitive behavior therapy. With empathy and insight, she illuminates the experiences and behaviors that have led individuals to their current state while offering guidance on making meaningful shifts to align their lives with their true selves and core values.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Roxanne Collins roxanne_collins_lpc (Instagram)
Master Class Sign Uphttps://neelycounseling.com/bsb-masterclass/
Neely Counseling Center https://neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story Today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
103: Relationship Check: Chaser or Runner – Which One Are You?
5 FEB 2024 · Have you ever questioned your role in this dance of love, or observed your partner sending mixed signals? In this episode, we will delve into the intriguing dynamic of the "runner-chaser" phenomenon that many individuals find themselves in. The chaser typically takes on the role of initiator, pushing for the relationship and yearning for love and acknowledgment, while the runner adopts a more distant, commitment-phobic stance, alternating between hot and cold behaviors, often sending mixed signals. Our goal is to explore both perspectives, understanding how past experiences might contribute to these patterns of behavior.
Key Takeaways: Know Your Attachment Style:
- Unearth the origins of your behavior by understanding attachment styles like anxious and insecure, rooted in childhood.
- Explore how these attachment styles shape your role as either a chaser or a runner in relationships.
Pay Attention to Defense Mechanisms:
- Spot the signs of defense mechanisms, including deflecting, constant blaming, or hot-and-cold behavior.
- Decode these red flags to gain insights into whether your partner is currently in a chaser or runner phase, fostering a healthier connection.
Healthy Doesn't Mean Perfect:
- Embrace the dance of a balanced relationship, where both partners take turns chasing and running.
- Acknowledge that imperfections are a natural part of the journey and commit to working through ups and downs for a resilient and lasting connection.
Guest Bio- Erika Chavez Pena M.ED., LPC
Erika Chavez Pena dedicated 21 years to the public education system, serving as a teacher for the deaf and hard of hearing and as a high school counselor. Transitioning to the role of a Licensed Professional Counselor, she has been actively engaged in the counseling profession for the past 6 years. During her early career as an educator, Erika cultivated a passion for public speaking, delivering presentations for students, parents, and community members. More recently, she expanded her expertise by providing training for Neely Counseling Center's Employee Assistance Program. Her presentations focus on the psychological and emotional well-being of individuals, emphasizing the importance of balancing emotional, cognitive, social, and physical aspects. Currently, Erika provides counseling services to adolescents, adults, and couples at Neely Counseling Center.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Need Counseling neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/drkirleen/?hl=en
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
102: Crushing Success Blocks: Overcoming Challenges This Year
4 JAN 2024 · 🎙️ Ready to Crush Success Blocks? Join us in the latest episode of "Crushing Success Blocks" on the Drop the BS podcast, where we unpack strategies to overcome emotional hurdles and pave the way for triumph. From challenging emotional avoidance to detoxing catastrophizing, discover how to master your mindset for success.
Key Takeaways:
Emotional Intelligence Unleashed:
-
- Challenge emotional avoidance by asking yourself, "PQ – What am I feeling?"
- Name and acknowledge emotions like worry, anxiety, fear, uncertainty, and doubt.
- Foster emotional awareness and resilience for personal growth.
Catastrophizing Detox:
-
- Combat catastrophizing by seeking a balanced perspective.
- Shift from jumping to conclusions to asking, "What is a more balanced way to look at this situation?"
- Break the habit of letting worst-case scenarios dominate your thoughts.
Opinions: Yours vs. Others:
-
- Examine whose opinion carries more weight – yours or others.
- Break the cycle of constant self-comparison, leading to feelings of inadequacy.
- Embrace your accomplishments without undermining them in comparison to others.
Listener Challenge:Challenge yourself this week to implement one strategy discussed in the episode to overcome emotional hurdles. Share your experiences using #CrushingSuccessBlocks.
Episode at a Glance
[2:16] A real story from the couch about breaking through success blocks
[14:00] Couch Time Takeaway's
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people, just like improving their mental health and living a better story today. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Need Counseling? Try Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/drkirleen/?hl=en
101: Forgiving the Unforgettable: Navigating Family Wounds Around the Holidays
18 DEC 2023 · Welcome to season six on Drop the BS podcast, where we dive deep into the delicate threads of family dynamics. In today's episode, we unravel the powerful narrative of forgiveness and healing, especially when family wounds cast a shadow over the joyous holiday season.
Here's the episode at a glance:
[2:35] Stroy from the Couch
[08:16] On the Couch Takeaway
🎄 Episode Highlights:
Case Study: A Holiday Dilemma
- We explore a poignant case where a wife grappled with the decision to visit her mother-in-law, given years of rudeness and disrespect. Join us as we delve into the complexities of this emotional journey.
Resolving Family Tensions
- Discover how our featured couple navigated through their challenges, ultimately finding a path to resolution. Real and relatable, their story serves as a guiding light for those facing similar family struggles during the holidays.
Counselor's Couch Takeaways
- Drawing from professional insights, we share actionable tips on how listeners can initiate healing conversations and work towards forgiveness. From setting boundaries to fostering open communication, these takeaways aim to empower you on your own journey.
🌈 Key Takeaways:
- Setting Boundaries: Learn the art of setting healthy boundaries to protect your emotional well-being.
- Open Communication: Explore the importance of transparent and empathetic communication, especially in the context of family dynamics.
- Forgiveness: Understand the transformative power of forgiveness and how it can pave the way for healing, even in the most challenging family relationships.
Similar Episodes:
88: The First Holiday After a Loss
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show:
Neely Counseling https://www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
100: Is It Time to Break Up with Your Bestie?
28 JUN 2023 · Breaking up with a best friend can feel just as painful as https://www.oprahdaily.com/life/a26040141/should-i-get-a-divorce/. And while everyone acknowledges the trauma of romantic breakups, people don’t really talk about the fallout of a platonic separation. But the truth is a breakup is a breakup. When you share intimacy, and trust, in a friendship making the decision to dissolve the relationship can be very difficult. So on today show I’ve brought on one of my besties Frank Baly to dish on this topic we’ve both had our ups and downs in friendship and I hope our perspectives helps you navigate the choppy water of breaking up with a bestie.
Similar Episodes:
87: Feeling Unheard and Unseen in Relationships?
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Frank Balyhttps://www.frankabaly.com
Neely Counseling https://www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
99: Are You Using Love Languages Incorrectly? (Part 2)
12 JUN 2023 · In Episode 99, Pt. 2, we continue to unravel the Love Language Paradox: I dive into the dos and don'ts of how to effectively use love languages. You will leave this episode ready to love and live from a new perspective.
Similar Episodes
79: Should You Consider Couples Counseling? w/Dr. Kimberly VanBuren
57: Heal Relationship Disconnects w/Third Layer Conversations
Rate, Review, & Follow-on Apple Podcasts:
Please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people -- just like to improve their mental health and live a better today story. Scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode! Also, if you haven't done so already, follow the podcast.
Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Love Language Test:https://5lovelanguages.com/
Neely Counseling https://www.neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
Drop The BS Facebook Group:https://www.facebook.com/groups/dropthebspodcast/
Life has a weird way of making the most amazing people feel like they’re not good enough. You know, not smart enough, pretty enough, or skinny enough. The Drop the...
show more
Life has a weird way of making the most amazing people feel like they’re not good enough. You know, not smart enough, pretty enough, or skinny enough. The Drop the BS podcast is dedicated to inspiring you through those moments. In each episode, seasoned therapist Dr. Kirleen Neely will take you in session to learn the tools you need to drop your backstory and live your best today story.306221
show less
Information
| Author | Drop the BS Podcast |
| Categories | Mental Health , Health & Fitness , Medicine |
| Website | dropthebspodcast.com |
| drkirleen@neelycounseling.com |
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