Franciscan Spirituality Center
920 Market Street
La Crosse, WI 54601
608-791-5295

https://www.fscenter.org

Bob Schmidt: In this episode, we’re going to be doing something a little different. Steve Spilde
will be talking to many people who’ve been through the SDPP program. Steve, a lot of people
don’t know what SDPP is. What is it?
Steve Spilde: SDPP is the Spiritual Direction Preparation Program. It’s a three-year program
where people train to become what is known as Spiritual Directors, or Spiritual Companions.
Primarily, it’s an opportunity for people to become better listeners. And in order to do that,
people need to examine what it is that blocks them from being good listeners. So they create an
open space within their heart so they can hear the stories of other people.
Bob: While doing the editing for this podcast, I had a chance to listen to a lot of different people
talk about what they’ve gotten out of the Spiritual Direction Preparation Program. What did you
get out of it?
Steve: I became a better listener – period. I became a better listener to my wife, a better listener
to my daughter, a better listener to my friends. And I think it opened the door for me to do the
work that I do leading retreats, leading workshops, meeting with people one-to-one, [and] really
hearing the stories people need to tell. In order for me to do that, I really had to learn how to
listen to my own story and not edit out parts, but listen to all my story – the painful parts, the sad
parts, the angry parts, the hurt parts [and] just get really comfortable. This is my story, and now
I can show up and listen to whatever story you need to tell. And I’m not going to ask you to edit
your story. You can tell whatever story you need to tell, and hopefully I’m prepared to hear that.
Bob: Who is Steve Spilde?
Steve: Steve Spilde is Director of the Spiritual Direction Preparation Program. He works as a
Spiritual Director and Retreat Leader at the Franciscan Spirituality Center. Steve is husband to
Jeannette and father to Sofia. Sofia has some challenges related to Autism, which has been a big
part of my story. It’s really opened me up to the possibility that life doesn’t always turn out the
way you might plan. But sometimes these things that seem pretty bad on the front end turn out
to have gifts, and turn out to offer opportunities. And that’s certainly been the case with our
daughter, Sofia. [She’s a] wonderful kid. [She’s] funny. But not what I would expect.
Bob: Steve, would you say life turns out the way it’s supposed to turn out?
Steve: I don’t know if there’s a “supposed to.” I think part of that is just being open to however
it turns out, that, “Wow, I think there’s goodness here.” I’m hesitant to say that because I know
some people who have suffered some terrible losses, and I don’t want to disrespect them by
saying, “Well, that’s the way it was supposed to happen.” I don’t know if any of these things are
supposed to happen. But I do have faith that even really horrible things that happen, gifts and
opportunities can come through new relationships, new learnings. And oftentimes, we find
support that we didn’t know we had before.

FSPA Podcast
2

Bob: Over the last many years of being the Spiritual Director Preparation Program Director, I’m
assuming you learned a lot of things over the years. What takeaways have you had?
Steve: We recently had a presenter here at the center for some other retreat. Her name is Diana
Butler Bass; she was on the podcast several months ago. [She’s a] wonderful author. She was
talking about the concept of re-membering. One understanding of that term “re-membering” is
the “re-membering.” All of us are composed of different parts of ourselves [such as] different
ages [and] different sides of our personality – just different members within ourselves. The
process of "re-membering” is the bringing all those parts together [and] bringing rejected parts of
ourselves back home. And I think that’s the part that’s really rewarding for me: seeing people in
SDPP being able to embrace all of their stories. Maybe they had periods of loss in their life. A
relationship didn’t work out. A job didn’t work out. When they tell the story of their life,
oftentimes that’s a part of their story that they try to hide. [It’s] really unfortunate because
sometimes that story really shapes who they are. Being able to claim all of the pieces of my
story have contributed to make me who I am. And I think people come out of the program more
whole, more at peace, and their hearts are more open. They’re better able to accept themselves,
and accept the people they meet.
Bob: I think a good place to start is to find out a little bit more about the participants.